GOD CUTS BACK AS U.S. FINANCIAL CRISIS DEEPENS
According to knowledgeable sources inside the Celestial Palace, God has decided to downsize the Holy Trinity to a Divine Dyad. "Given what's happening on Wall Street, we no longer can afford to support a tripartite CEO structure for managing the universe," God announced at a board meeting that included Buddha, Martin Luther, Moses, Joseph Smith, and Jerry Falwell. "We're going to keep Jesus Christ on the payroll, but the Holy Spirit will be laid off at the end of 2008. He'll receive an attractive severance package, including eternal health care and lifetime DirecTV satellite service." The Holy Spirit will be free to negotiate with other spiritual superpowers, and chances are good that He'll sign on with the Gandhi/Mother Teresa Consulting Group, based in East Heaven.
According to knowledgeable sources inside the Celestial Palace, God has decided to downsize the Holy Trinity to a Divine Dyad. "Given what's happening on Wall Street, we no longer can afford to support a tripartite CEO structure for managing the universe," God announced at a board meeting that included Buddha, Martin Luther, Moses, Joseph Smith, and Jerry Falwell. "We're going to keep Jesus Christ on the payroll, but the Holy Spirit will be laid off at the end of 2008. He'll receive an attractive severance package, including eternal health care and lifetime DirecTV satellite service." The Holy Spirit will be free to negotiate with other spiritual superpowers, and chances are good that He'll sign on with the Gandhi/Mother Teresa Consulting Group, based in East Heaven.
posted by Mike | 8:35 PM
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