PUTIN: ANOTHER CONTROVERSIAL CHOICE?

Neighbors of Vladimir Putin have expressed surprise over the naming of the Russian leader as "Person of the Year" by TIME magazine. Yakov Dorsk, an electrician who lives next door to Putin in Moscow, observed that "He's always been a quiet, keep-to-himself kind of guy. He'll wave to you when he picks up his paper in front of the house in the morning, but that's about it." Natasha Markov, a beautician who resides two houses down from Putin, didn't realize that he worked in government. "He's the President? I never would have guessed! I did his nails about 4 months ago. He takes good care of them. Never dirty, never split, great cuticles. Doesn't talk much. Sometimes he stares at my breasts while I'm filing, and that makes me a little nervous. But he's OK." A less complimentary view was shared by Boris Mischev, a retired postal employee who lives across the street from Putin. "His head looks like a peeled potato that's been boiled. He had my dog Tovol arrested in August for urinating on his car, and I haven't seen him since. They tell me that Tovol is being held in Minsk for 'questioning about the activities of certain canines of interest.' You know what I say? BULLSHIT on you, Vladimir Puti-man!!"