WHEN I AM KING....

......only Major League Baseball teams named after cities will be allowed to play in the post-season. Teams like the Arizona Diamondbacks, Colorado Rockies, and Florida Marlins will be out of luck. I'm sorry, but I just can't take these teams seriously, no matter how many games they win. This year, I am declaring the winner of the Boston-Cleveland series as World Series Champions by default.

The same goes for the National Football League. The Tennessee Titans? The Carolina Panthers? The Arizona Cardinals? The New England Patriots? No more playoffs for them.

Please don't try to change my mind. I've thought a lot about all of this, and I know I'm doing the right thing.