YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP

Tomorrow morning I fly to Chicago on United Airlines -- Economy Class, of course. As I was checking in on-line, United informed me that I could purchase up to 5 additional inches of leg room in Economy Class for just $22 (no joke).

For an extra $27, I could purchase unlimited urination privileges in the bathroom in First Class.

And for $41, I could buy the rights to pee on anyone seated in First Class.

I absolutely LOVE this country.