LATEST SHOCKER: STEROIDS THE LEAST OF A-ROD'S PROBLEMS

Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse for Yankees third baseman and steroid user Alex Rodriguez, they did. Police records reveal that when the superstar played for the Texas Rangers, he was arrested twice for attempting to suck the blood out of newborns in a Dallas maternity ward. According to Texas Attorney General Theodore "Ted" Talbot, Rodriguez claimed that baby fluids made him "strong like a bull."