SNAP-SNAP, WHO'S THERE?

In response to a recent post (September 20th) concerning proper etiquette for interacting with women who display written messages or brand names on the backside of their gym shorts, Dave inquired about the "Exposed Bra Strap" challenge: tank tops that do not conceal the straps of the brassiere worn under them.

Fortunately, Dave, this problem has recently been addressed by the I-Triple-M (International Manufacturers of Mammary-related Merchandise). In a policy advisory appearing in the August 2006 issue of Bosom Quarterly, the IMMM recommends the following:

"When approaching from behind a female with EBS (Exposed Bra Straps), the male should gently insert his forefinger between the female's right shoulder blade and the bra strap, and then quickly pull back the strap approximately 6 inches before releasing it suddenly. The snapping sensation (and accompanying sound) will draw the attention of the female, giving the male an opportunity to properly introduce himself. When a male approaches an EBS female who is walking TOWARDS him, he should politely ask the female to turn around, and then follow the procedure previously described."

I hope this information is helpful not only to Dave, but to others who have grappled with this potentially awkward situation. I would like to thank Meghan and Gary, who served as fact-checkers for this posting.