TURNING THE CORNER IN IRAQ
According to an Associated Press story that appeared in the New York Times on Friday, an end to the violence in Iraq is, at long last, in sight. Researchers at the Senseless Slaughter Census Center in Chicago ("You kill 'em, We count 'em") project that, by the end of 2007, the hostilities between Shi'ites and Sunnis will have killed off virtually everyone in this troubled nation. In the words of Senior Analyst Winston Feckner, "there just isn't going to be anyone left to strap a suicide bomb to. The most likely scenario is that the government will be taken over by sand crabs that have migrated from the Iraqi desert into Baghdad."
Not surprisingly, the Bush Administration welcomed the news. "We can work with sand crabs," Vice President Dick Cheney said during a speech at a fundraiser. "And the ones we can't work with, we'll eat."
According to an Associated Press story that appeared in the New York Times on Friday, an end to the violence in Iraq is, at long last, in sight. Researchers at the Senseless Slaughter Census Center in Chicago ("You kill 'em, We count 'em") project that, by the end of 2007, the hostilities between Shi'ites and Sunnis will have killed off virtually everyone in this troubled nation. In the words of Senior Analyst Winston Feckner, "there just isn't going to be anyone left to strap a suicide bomb to. The most likely scenario is that the government will be taken over by sand crabs that have migrated from the Iraqi desert into Baghdad."
Not surprisingly, the Bush Administration welcomed the news. "We can work with sand crabs," Vice President Dick Cheney said during a speech at a fundraiser. "And the ones we can't work with, we'll eat."
posted by Mike | 8:32 PM
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